The Pull-Push Phenomenon

Toward the end of my stay in China, I recognized a trend among the expatriate crowd in Asia. Expats in Asia --for all their various nationalities, travels and experiences--can be broadly organized into two groups. Category One is characterized first by youth. These are the ambitious, adventurous lads who have recently graduated from a liberal arts college and have decided to exploit the demand for English teachers abroad. These folks, generally speaking, are interesting, perceptive, perhaps bohemian and often worldly. When stories are exchanged among foreigners, they tend to ask more questions than state opinions; they learn the local language for, if no other reason, to impress cute, submissive locals; they try to maintain respect and a healthy curiosity for the country in which they reside. In short, they are pulled from the motherland to Asia by its inherent mystery and exoticism.

And then there’s Category Two. As you might have guessed, Twosies are noticeably older than their younger counterparts, though not necessarily old or middle-aged. Since their graduation a decade ago or more, they have remained in Asia teaching English. You’ll notice immediately how knowledgeable they are as they expound stories at great length and condescension to folks in Category One. Twosies are often jaded; they criticize local customs and admonish other expats for condoning them. Their personalities range to slightly discomforting to borderline sociopathic. When you see them verbally assaulting Asians in the native tongue for some trivial misunderstanding, you all at once realize that there had to be something wrong with them to keep them here so long. It occurs to you that they may have not belonged wherever they came from, and indeed they felt pushed to Asia by some inability to function normally at home.

‘Course, there are enough expats straddling the two categories to suggest that it isn’t as clear-cut as I would make it seem. Social awkwardness and years spent working abroad, however, are correlative enough to imply that perhaps it is actually the time spent overseas that is psychologically degenerative. It’s difficult to say without taking one’s personal history into account.

So here’s mine. I spent two years living in Asia. I’m 25, passing out of the “recent college graduate” phase to “yeah, I have a degree” phase. I went to Korea back in 2006 excited as a Category One could be. I came home from China last March thinking I would find entry-level work relevant to my degree and pursue a graduate program in the following year. What I quickly understood though, is that I am not marketable to decent labor. I’ve had a vague, idealistic idea of the career I want, I’ve been living in my parents’ home in a remote village near the Canadian border, and over the last two months of job searching, all I’ve managed to secure is another teaching job in Korea.

I need money and purpose just like the next bloke, but Korea again? No other country pays nearly as well for its foreign teachers whom lack certification. Yet I am reluctant to relive an experience. I only have so much time on this earth, and I shouldn’t be doing work that isn’t what I hope to do ten years from now, right? Right. I’m 25, encroaching 26, and the threat of swirling down the quagmire of Category Two looms. The hour is late to rethink my decision. My sanity wanes. Here I go, again.